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Rudolph the Half-Wit Lawyer

To the tune of ‘Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.’ Part of a series of new carols for 2019.

Steve Burgess 25 Dec

Steve Burgess writes about politics and culture for The Tyee. Find his previous articles here.

[Editor’s note: Our final silly Tyee carol for 2019. Find our full list here. Thanks for reading, and happy holidays readers!]

Rudolph the half-wit lawyer,
Was a very loopy guy
And if you saw his client
You would understand just why.

All of the other lawyers,
Used to laugh and call him names.
Everyone knew poor Rudolph,
Was not blessed with legal brains.

Then one post-election eve,
Donald came to say,
“New York’s ready to indict,
Rudy, you are not so bright.”

“Truth isn’t truth,” said Rudy,
And they shouted out with glee,
“Rudy the half-wit lawyer,
You’re the worst in history!”

Happy holidays, readers! Our comment threads will be closed until Jan. 2 to give our moderators a break. See you in 2020.  [Tyee]

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