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Please Advise! The BC Liberals Need a New Name

Heck yes! Our political spin doc is always up for a rebranding exercise. Add your own ideas.

Steve Burgess 19 May 2021TheTyee.ca

Steve Burgess writes about politics and culture for The Tyee. Find his previous articles here.

[Editor’s note: Steve Burgess is an accredited spin doctor with a PhD in Centrifugal Rhetoric from the University of SASE, situated on the lovely campus of PO Box 7650, Cayman Islands. In this space he dispenses PR advice to politicians, the rich and famous, the troubled and well-heeled, the wealthy and gullible.]

Dear Dr. Steve,

Kevin Falcon has just announced his candidacy for the leadership of the BC Liberal Party. As part of his announcement, he suggested that the party should adopt a new name.

What do you think they should call themselves?

Signed,

Label Maker

Dear LM,

It does make sense. The BC Liberal Party severed official ties with the federal Liberals years ago. The name should definitely go. Some options.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch

From a marketing standpoint this is a proven winner. And as a political brand it’s still available — so long as they don’t diversify into retail, they should be OK. Christie is another solid brand, but maybe not in this case.

The People’s Party of BC

If you are going to borrow the name of a national party, there are other options than Liberals. After all, you don’t want the taint of association with someone like Justin Trudeau.

The No Democratic Party

This is more of a Republican thing, admittedly — the BC Liberals have certainly not advocated any sort of armed insurrection or voter suppression tactics to date. However, if they have been watching the U.S. scene and taking notes, this could be a contender. Down there it seems to appeal to a surprisingly large segment of the populace.

Social Credit

It’s like when NHL teams have retro jersey nights. Just revert back to the original moniker. Fantastic!

The 'You Won’t Believe What These Former Child Stars Look Like Now' Party

Gotta get those clicks. Number 17 is particularly incredible!

Progressive Jackpot Party

The Cullen Commission on casino money laundering has made clear how much dirty cash was sluicing through our casinos under former gaming minister Rich Coleman. Those freewheeling days could well be back soon. What have you got to lose?

Captain America Party

Spoiler alert: The recent Marvel Comics TV series The Falcon and the Winter Soldier saw the titular Falcon rebrand as Captain America. For our Kevin Falcon, that’s an intriguing precedent. Long ago the Socreds ran an ad showing NDP premier Dave Barrett wearing red underwear, back in the day, Captain America used to battle his nemesis the Red Skull. It has possibilities.

The 'Enough Already with All These Goddamn Canada Geese' Party

This one could prove surprisingly popular. A sleeper issue.

The Fire Jim Benning Party

Whatever supporters you do attract will be fanatical. And they’ll actually spend their own money on advertising.

The Ryan Reynolds Party

Why not? Everybody loves the guy, and he’s too nice to sue you.  [Tyee]

Read more: BC Politics

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