Tonight, Join us for a 'Canada Party' Party

[Editor's note: In recent weeks, The Tyee introduced to you The Canada Party, otherwise known as two Vancouver satirists who've unveiled their platform as the uninvited third-party candidate in the next U.S. election. It's all come together in a new book America, But Better: The Canada Party Manifesto, published by Douglas & McIntyre.

Together, we're throwing a great bash tomorrow night (Sept. 27) in Vancouver to celebrate the party's hard work and worthy mission of restoring America to its former glory. Hear the candidates discuss their vision. Enjoy musical guests Rusty Ford & the Extra Regular Guys. Hobnob with a glamorous celebrity panel, featuring investor Sandy Garossino, Vision city councillor Heather Deal, writer/broadcaster Steve Burgess, and kid-crooner Raffi, who'll tackle the question: "What the hell are we going to do about America anyway?" And watch Tyee editor David Beers attempt to keep everyone in line as moderator.

It's all going down at the WISE Hall in East Vancouver, starting at 7 p.m. Where to buy tickets? At the door for $10, or right here for the cheapies ($8). More on the Facebook event page here. And even more details in this story's sidebar. Don't miss it.

Finally, so that you will be well prepared for November's election shenanigans, and to get an idea of what The Canada Party has in store tomorrow night, we present here their "Grok the Vote" drinking game.]

A candidate invokes the Founding Fathers to address an issue that didn't exist before 1972: Take a drink.

A candidate mispronounces a country with whom the U.S. is at war: Take a drink.

A candidate says he wants to get the government out of your private life, and then argues against contraception or gay marriage in the same sentence: Take a drink.

A candidate complains about the unfair treatment of white people: Take a drink.

A candidate attacks the moderator for asking a fair question: Take a drink.

A moderator apologizes for asking a fair question: Take two drinks.

A candidate cites the teachings of Jesus in an argument against helping the poor: Take a drink.

A candidate proposes a tax plan that will buy him a backup mansion: Take a drink.

A candidate calls for a pre-emptive bombing of a hypothetical threat: Take a drink and google "Iraq 2: Iran Sans Qur'an."

A candidate stresses "investing in America" even though he's personally invested in Switzerland: Take a drink.

An audience member claims to speak for a candidate's dog: Take a drink and howl at the television.

A candidate claims tax breaks for millionaires trickle down to the rest of us: Take two drinks and google "Trump plane."

A candidate makes a grammar error during a speech about education: Mix yourself a "Dewar's Decimal" -- one part Scotch Whisky, two parts irony.

A candidate touts American Exceptionalism based solely on military strength: Take a drink and read Chapter 2.1, "How to Make Other Countries Feel Bad About Their Bodies."

A candidate calls Britain the United States's greatest ally, even though we're STANDING RIGHT HERE: Drink a Canadian Club, then find your most southern-facing window and moon America.

A candidate defends religious freedom and then demonizes the Muslim faith: Drink 40 Virgin Daiquiris.

A candidate defends the environmental record of oil companies: Take a drink with an "Exxon Chaser," which is a dirty Grey Goose on the rocks.

A candidate tries to identify with the unemployed by referencing the tough times when he had to live off his investments: Take a drink and charge it to your boss.

A candidate claims you're not poor if you own an appliance: Take a drink and comb your fridge for precious metals.

A candidate claims he has combat experience because he had to fight for a parking space at Trader Joe's: Chug an organic wine cooler.

A candidate claims America should never apologize for its mistakes: Down a "Foxtini," which is Absolut with a sour twist.

A candidate refers to a very recent cultural norm as a "traditional value": Down your cosmo and read a history book.

An audience member makes a racist statement during the Q&A: Take a drink and slap yourself.

A candidate fails to correct the racist statement because it works in his favour: Take a drink and slap the person on your right. If that person is of a different race, do a "Hate Crime Shot" (waterboard yourself with tequila).

A candidate disparages Canada's health care: Take a drink and move to Canada.

A candidate provides a fair, informed and practical solution to a complex problem: Consume remaining alcohol and exit the holodeck.

Hope you can join us to toast The Canada Party book launch, this Thursday, Sept. 27 in East Vancouver. Event details here.