I have a problem with the

I have a problem with the word vagina being used to describe women's genitals. Given the importance of the clitoris in sexual arousal it always drives me crazy to hear 'vagina,' which I don't deny is an important part of our anatomy, used when vulva, labia, or clitoris would probably be much more accurate terms for what is being referred to. The vagina is only the inner tube leading from the vulva to the uterus, and unless I am some kind of unusual woman, it is not the place where women feel sexual arousal. The vulva, particularly the clitoris, but also including the labia majora and the labia minora, is where we perceive sexual arousal. I believe the vagina is involved in orgasm in that vaginal contractions take place during orgasm, but if you were to ask any mindful woman where she perceives arousal as it develops, or what area would need the most stimulation for an orgasm to occur, it won't be inside the vagina. For this reason 'The Vagina Monologues' drove me nuts. It would be kind of like referring to men's genitals as 'the scrotum' or something. So...please women - and men, let's call a spade a spade, and a clitoris a clitoris, and the labia the labia, and a vulva (which includes both) a vulva. I think this concept alone will lead to more potential sexual mindfulness for those needing to develop it, which I of course encourage. It will also help men become better lovers by knowing what areas need stimulation, a pretty huge factor in the equation as well. Thanks for the opportunity to express this idea where others might read it, because it is a subject that frequently drives me nuts.

Vagina

I think it is well known that 'vagina' is commonly used to describe the whole set inside and out of the female bits.
And as for 'any mindful woman'... I know at least one for whom where 'most stimulation for an orgasm to occur' is inside, what people call the G-spot. Poor thing spent years wondering what was wrong with her before she got right in there and figured it out.
and...
Sexuality is a quality of life issue?
Um, Yes. Of course. Whatever the grant is, times it by at least a factor of ten. If people were all learning to be mindful enough to have great sex... well, the world would be a better place.

I think Sex may be a quality of life issue for some

But 'sexuality'...I don't think so.

Please consider the word's definition:

Sexuality - the quality or state of being sexual: a: the condition of having sex b: sexual activity c: expression of sexual receptivity or interest especially when excessive.

Without some kind of modifier like 'healthy', appropriate, or even (if you must 'mindful') I think promoting simple sexuality is neither sensible nor needed. There's too damn much 'overt' sexuality on television, the internet and in advertising now.

People should put sex (as good as it can be) back into some kind of appropriate relationship with the rest of their lives.

We've just spent years investigating, trying and convicting a man for killing 6 women (and perhaps others) who were involved in a business - many of them - that is way too involved with 'sexuality'.

My view.

where it goes no time flat...

Notice what just happened here? Somebody mentions a problem of sex-organ-brain disconnect, and before we know it, we are into naming all the parts and quarreling over how they 'work'. The CONNECT was the problem, and the other end of that connect was the brain, duh.

It may not all be in our heads, but it is my considered opinion, that the part that is, is the one that needs to be addressed, and the course of this discourse bears that out in spades.

Dorothy, I'm not exactly

Dorothy, I'm not exactly sure what you are saying, but.... Please don't think that I am advocating that, during sex or sexual arousal, any woman should be concentrating on any kind of anatomy lesson. That would be the time for her to be "mindful" of the beauty of it all. It's just that, because of the images we are all saturated with, many people have inaccurate images, or so I assume given what pornography etc. apparently conveys about women's bodies and desires. I can't pretend to have a lot of personal awareness of the medium of pornography, but even without seeking it out, some of the ideas it puts out there affect all of us. The little bit I did see recently, on some kind of site that I was led to by a Tyee article some months ago, concerned me in regard to the thought of young people being shaped by what they see represented. I noticed a huge preponderence of photos and films related to anal sex between men and women, which concerned me. I don't object to two adults engaging in any practice that they both feel good about, including anal sex, but I am concerned when the expectation that all women prefer this particular sexual act to all others all the time is perpetuated by being represented almost exclusively, which I came to suspect was the case. Personally I try to connect with the Goddess, who I envision as the giver of love in all its complexity (which isn't always sweetness and light), when I need to eliminate the body mind disconnect. If I had to be involved exclusively in a sex act that didn't stimulate any of my orgasmic tissue (which exists in limited body parts, like the penis and clitoris for example), while pretending to have orgasms for the benefit of a man simply because that's what he expects, it would be difficult to keep that Goddess connection going. It is very important that we and our lovers understand both minds and bodies. In contrast to what I think you are saying, Dorothy, I think that this kind of issue is actually quite relevant to a discussion about mind/body connection/disconnection. I hope the author and the researchers mentioned in the article will see fit to comment on the ensuing discussion.

I'll try

This is kind of difficult, because it moves into a very personal area, where 'opinions' really don't stretch.

I would say, that if you remember assumptions and agendas etc, while supposedly carrying out the effectuation of a meaningful relationship, you still labor under that 'disconnect'. The connect would be recognizable by there not being an awareness of such things as individual body parts. I don't know that I have ever been aware of separate 'orgasmic tissues' beyond explorative activities in my pre-teens. That is not 'how you do it' as an adult, at least not where I came from. Integration of the whole person in a unified experience, where thought (what there is of it), feeling, and all the physical stuff are not 'findable' as separate entities is the hallmark of the disconnect having been eliminated. Again this is a very persoanl thing, and I can see where the guru-thing comes in, simply to make people (not just women) forget their separate and separated agenda-items and anxieties. In my day, we would put Ravel's Bolero, or Wagner's Ride of the Valkyries on the grammo. I don't know what they do today, but some kind of shamanic input works for many people, who would otherwise have difficulty.

What a relief...

All these years I figured the criticisms of my performances were warranted. Now I find that it might not have been me; she's been multi-tasking.