How about

The working class can kiss my ass, I got the PM's job at last!

Nixon and Mulroney?

I wondered how long it would take somebody to play Nixon's, "I am not a crook." Next to Mulroney's, "I have done nothing wrong"? This is close but maybe the Canadian Air Farce will do a piece next.

Wow! A man that can cook and write poetry!

Absolutely delicious, James.

Great Sport

There once was a poli named Brian
So good at baloney, 'was hardly tryin'

Just for a lark he took a shot at Joe Clark
Then was laughing just like he was cryin'

He cajoled the pequistes, pulled in the out-wests
Hunky-dory prevailed
He looked like the best

Tipped his toe in Meech Lake
'twas a terrible mistake
Threw caution to the wind
With so much at stake

T'wards the end of his fame a flush shadow did came
With many a note in just an en-velope

Sharpish and with haste
In Bri's pocket it went
What's a bad taste
When he needed the rent

"Thanks for the gift"
"Can I give you a lift?"
"Well I think that I thought that you knew"

Pizzas and planes and immigration games
What is this shadow in-to?

Better stay away
Stash this dough deep away,
And just let the whole thing blow through

Many years yet
Like a nagging old debt,
Old shadow pops up
Who knew?
Does it look sticky - you bet!

Bri's not contrite
Never been; he'll fight
'Cause when caught in a corner
Watch out he might gore ya

Media hounds
Are hot on the case
But he'll be ready
And with a straight face
Will shadow's repatriation
Bring an end to this race?

Has the money been spent?
Did inflation kick in?
Can they ever prove
That he was living in sin?

At the End of the Day
All will have their say
A judgement may come down
That might benefit the Crown

On the other hand
Based on the Law of the Land
Many will feel indignated
If Bri is vindicated

Ode to Karlheinz - a good friend in a pinch

Between the finite limits of what he earned
And the boundless yearnings of his ambition;
The thought of 40 hours of humdrum work each week
All the while recalling fondly the pandering of flatterers.

Remembered Prime Ministerial perquisites,
And the glory of what he had been.
The voodoo incantations of a trophy wife -
The fine stone-clad house in Westmount,

All these conspired together in his mind
To drive him on to that fateful assignation
And envelopes packed with thousand-dollar bills.

There are some born who can't be bought.
And others for whom the only question is
How much?

He had in image to live up to:
Mila with her furs and Champaign tastes
People he could buy and sell to his advantage –
The gift of blarney would not let him down.

He had a young family to look out for
And the burden of his own self-fashioned reputation.

haiku

labour law iron ore
leader of his tribe his peak
cash may crush his autumn

Come Fly with Me

He came on to the scene
Just like a dream
Looked like he might be the best

Snagged the separatists back est
Some of Ontario's best
And even the crazies out west

Took the F18's
Back to Quebec
We all, know - the rest

So sorry Winni-peg
The prize it not yours
Even though you are the best

Brian, Brian and the jets.

At the stroke of a pen
Bought a Wardair' 310
Made a mighty fine den

Accused of sheer Gaul
For a Flying Taj Mahal
It created quite a pall

Brian, Brian and the jets.

Boeings were getting old
Airbus came on bold
Was Air Canada actually told

Was Schreiber really the guy
Who said that he would try
To make these birds fly

Brian, Brian and the jets.

He travels in style
With Mila and her smile
Like Royalty with guile

Wether wrong or right
There's a fascination alright
In this long lore of flight

Brian, Brian, Brian, Brian, Brian and the jets.

With thanks to Richard and Robert Sherman and Elton John and Bernie Taupin

Mulrouney's millions

Why is this news?

Jean Chretien's Auberge Grandmere, was a $680,000 scan. Who knows what that consumate businessman, Paul Martin did to improve his finances while in office?
Trudeau spent billions of dollars, putting Canada in hock for another generation. Brian's little nest-egg barely paid Mila's manicure bill. The only surprise to me is that he asked Schreiber to sign a letter saying the payment never took place. That is like the burglar asking the property owner for permission to steal the family jewels, or a car thief knocking on the door to ask for the extra set of keys (that has actually happened, by the way).

There ought to be a minimum amount of fraud for which M.P.'s can be charged. Prime ministers should be allowed $1 million, cabinet ministers $750,000 and the lowly back benchers $500,000. As a matter of fact, they should be encouraged to skim a few bucks from private industry, and their pensions should be cancelled forthwith.

Since politicians seem to like outsourcing and PPP partnerships, they should be encouraged to immerse themselves in it.