Fair enough. It's prohibited under Canadian law to hunt with a handgun. Unless you're a cop, a game warden or an armoured car guard, the only legal purpose of owning a handgun is to go to a handgun range and shoot targets. So wait, why are we being tested on our ability to identify hollow-point rounds?

From Wikipedia: "In essence, the hollow-point bullet has two interrelated purposes: to increase its size once within the target, thus maximizing tissue damage and blood loss or shock; and to remain inside the target, thereby transferring all of its kinetic energy to that target." One of the instructors anticipates the question. "Look, some of these rounds you're learning about have anti-personnel applications. But you're going to be using them on paper targets. End of story."

Certainly Canada's restricted-firearms laws are designed to keep things that way. You have to get a transport permit for each handgun just to take it to the range and back. At home, it's supposed to be locked up, far away from any compatible ammunition. Still, a handgun is hardly the most lethal thing you can keep at your house.

The registry

For under $200, you can buy a Russian SKS, the precursor to the AK-47 assault rifle. They fire the same gigantic bullet, but the SKS is semi-automatic, meaning one shot every time you squeeze the trigger. It also comes fitted with a bayonet. You can take that off, though. In fact, you can buy all sorts of after-market kits for the SKS that let you mount scopes, red-dot sights, bipods, whatever. The one thing you can't buy, legally, is a clip holding more than five bullets.

I'm more of a 12-gauge guy, myself. You can load six shells in a Benelli tactical shotgun -- a favourite "urban operations" tool of the U.S. Marine Corps. With a cut-down barrel and a folding stock, you can bring it down to two feet, two inches, and still have it classified as a non-restricted firearm. Same as the SKS. They're both "long-guns," which means no restricted status, and no registry.

Or the Mossberg 500 Chainsaw, a device clearly designed to be fired from the hip. Eschewing the idea of a shoulder rest entirely, the Chainsaw appears more popular online with zombie hunters than pheasant hunters. It too is a "long-gun," which means no restricted status, and no registry.

Thanks to the Conservative government, now being destroyed are all records of Canada's current stock of tactical pump-actions and bayonet-mounted SKS assault rifles, along with every high-powered hunting rifle and automatic shotgun -- more than seven million long-guns in all. My future purchases will also be a mystery, even to police. I can carry them around in a car without a permit. If they're stolen, it's up to me to report the theft. And if I choose to sell them, I don't have to check the buyer's gun license. To quote one Tory MP when the new rules came into effect, "Free at last! Free at last!"

Back in Surrey, we're writing our second test, the one that will allow us to possess restricted firearms (the ones the cops still know about). I look up at the clock. I realize it's not a clock; it's a round, metallic Glock sign. Time to get shootin'. I look back at my test. It all seems a bit easy. "A .357 Magnum round is dangerous at a distance of 1.5 km. True or False?" "Before firing, a responsible gun user should A) Be sure of the target; B) Be sure of the area behind the target; C) Adopt a safe stance; D) All of the above."

I double check my answers and hand the test in. I sit and wait. Others finish and look around the room. Colin sits in deep concentration, his eyes glassy, staring at his paper. Slowly, slowly, he colours in an answer bubble and moves to the next. Tony is antsy. The second period of the hockey game just started over at the Hook & Ladder.

Colin finishes. The tests are graded on the spot. He passes. I pass. We all pass. "Congratulations!" says Tony. "Now get out of here!" Is there a slight swagger as we stride across the parking lot? Have our gaits changed since yesterday? Maybe it's my imagination.