She's up against a lot. She blames the "puritanical, double-standards culture, where people believe that a teen abstinence campaign will actually work, where parents are too embarrassed to have conversations about sex with their children, and where educational institutions are terrified of being politically incorrect if they pick up those conversations. So it's not surprising that hardcore porn has become de facto sex education."

But, she says in her talk, that her site is "absolutely not about judgment. This is not about good and bad. Sex is the area of human experience that embraces the vastest possible range of proclivities. It is also not a judgment of hardcore porn. I am a fan of hardcore pornography. I watch it regularly myself; although my overriding criteria when I select it is to choose something that does not overly resemble open-heart surgery. But because the porn industry is driven by men, funded by men, managed by men, directed by men and targeted at men, porn tends to represent one worldview. It tends to say this is how it is. And what I want to say is, 'not necessarily.'"

She says she was "extremely nervous" before and during the talk -- mostly because even though she'd told some friends about her idea, she worried other people wouldn't respond well. So she has been especially gratified by the response: and not by the media response so much as that of young people and their parents.

A number of "young people," have said and emailed reactions like, "Oh my God! I love it. That is absolutely what I've encountered myself."

"Parents were particularly struck by it, and a lot of them said to me that they'd forwarded the site to their 16-year-old daughter or 18-year-old son. I think they particularly welcomed the fact that they could forward the link on without needing to have the conversation themselves, which is precisely why I began the site."

She's also had a "huge amount of submissions from people sending in their own porn world/real world ideas," from countries around the world.

One of the last emails she received was from a young Moroccan man who wrote to say, "Thank you so much. Young people in Morocco are like young people in the U.S., they are heavily influenced by porn. Now at last I can tell my friends how to make love to a girl, thanks to your wonderful website."

Of course, there isn't just her website out there. Plenty of sex educators are working hard to bring credible information to the porn-saturated masses. And there's also a growing industry of female-produced porn and lesbian porn (and as one friend said, it's not exactly difficult to get a guy to watch that).

Look, it's ridiculous to base the debate about pornography into one about whether it turns people into aggressive monsters or not. That turns a really interesting cultural discussion into a totally polarized, extreme and irrelevant one. Porn is having a profound impact on our culture and it's far more worthwhile discussing what its specific effects are (and there are many) and how to navigate those better, than simply argue over whether those effects are good or bad.