Spiritual

It has so many meanings that it no longer has any.

Are you spiritual?

Don't "How are you?" me! Not unless you really want to know!

Oh, Thank you, Katherine Hamer. I began to think nobody would ever ask!

How are yewwwww? That's what I hate.

Shows interest, you say? Like hell. One morning I gave myself a severe talking-to. I said: "You could make the effort to go along. Just say 'Fine thank you!', smile, and continue with your business."

So -- determined to be agreeable -- I went to the bank and was confronted by the nice lady who greets everybody at the door with "How are yewwwww?" Once I had barked "Fine!" she let me pass. But when I got to the teller, the teller of course (obviously under orders) said "How are yewwwww?" again.

Well, I was going to recite "Fine, thank you" ... but suddenly I realized I'd be talking to her ear, as she had already turned to speak to the teller next to her. By the time she had finished with that important business, she had mercifully forgotten to appear to be giving a damn how I am.

And that's the thing of it. People who ask Howryewww 500 times a day don't give a damn. How could they? Maybe once, long ago, it was a wonderful, caring thing to ask after someone's well-being. But it isn't anymore ... now it's the opposite ... now it says "Let me show you how much I don't give a damn!" I know this because sometimes it's spoken in a singsong which declares "I gotta say this but I don't enjoy saying this."

And there are days when a person's health is fragile, when your knees shake and your heart can't keep its proper rythmn and you're scared you aren't going to make it home. How does that heartless throw-away comment sound then?

Well, Katherine, I can answer that, too. Telling people you don't give a damn about them, while acting out a pretense that you do, sounds like an invitation to punch somebody in the nose while shouting "There! Does that tell ya how I am??"

Because there are days when we don't feel well, when we're grieving or worried, and when we'd love to have someone really ask: "How [/i][/b]are[i][b] you, Mary?" People can tell the difference.

Recently someone I love phoned up and asked "How are you?" It wasn't a throw-away line but I knew he had a low tolerance for chit-chat. So I said "Oh, I'm OK." He lowered his voice and emphasized his words: "No, I mean, how are you?" Then I knew he would listen. And the listening made me feel much, much better.

And that's the thing of it: hypocritizing such a caring remark is really not OK. It can turn "I love you" into "Phttt. Like I care." Not OK. So I'm agin it.

Maybe next-worst (and it's pretty much disappeared, hasn't it?) was that ubiquitous "There you go" in cheap cafes when your hamburger arrived.

"Have a nice day" seems to have died a natural death.

But I'm sure you won't be surprised that I get clenched-fist and slit-eyed when my restaurant dinner arrives and somebody barks "Enjoy!" Huh. "Maybe I will, maybe I won't, but I'll decide that," I think to myself, as I mumble "Thank you."

Sigh. [i][b]

Kids say the darndest things

As a parent of a six-year old... 'why' is sure wearing out its welcome. Grandma just smiles and assures me it's payback from the gods for my own inquisitive nature.

I wish we had a better word than cunt. Something powerful and sexy too. Seems unfair that guys get 'cock' (cock of the walk, cock a gun, etc) and women get saddled with the dreaded 'c-word'.

Some other bad words

How about "war," surely the most obscene of words? Then what about "bosses", "authoritarianism", "empire" or "capitalism"? All of which are vile, creepy and cruel.

cocean, I totally agree.

cocean, I totally agree. I'd lump the word "heinous" in there too. Every crime reported by journalists is now "heinous", and every death is a "tragedy". "Transgressive" is another outmoded banality, and "offensive" isn't far behind. "Community" has totally lost its meaning (i.e. the legal "community"; the drug-user "community"; the LGBTXYZ "community").

Nothing quite beats the visceral phonetic crudity of "cunt". We routinely refer to men with equally crude images (dick, asshole, prick), but nothing quite matches the savage Dionysian potency of that word (or its ancient and near-universal heritage...it's the word that can't be killed, even after whole cultures and languages have gone extinct).

How could I forget...

...I'd also add the words "fag" and "faggot" as words I can't stand. They far outstrip "cunt" in the degree of poison they can contain (contingent on context, of course).

Actually, now that I think about it, my all-time most hated word is the N-word. And that doesn't depend on context!

Bush

Bush

Revisioning

Well, it has only recently begun to get on my nerves, but now when I hear, see or read the joyous pronouncement that...."The Toronto Stock Market has just reached its highest level in history" - yet again - I want to puke.

Since every notch up means a greater spread between ME and THEM, WTF should I, upon hearing this good news, immediately fall to my knees and salamn Eastward in routine thankfulness for the benfecence of the Gods dwelling on Bay Street?

Broad, faggot, wicked (as in

Broad, faggot, wicked (as in that is so wicked, duuuude)

amazing

1. aMAZing - with emphasis on the second syllable

2. 'thoughts and prayers' - there's just something insincere when you see a tv reporter reading this off a teleprompter to close out some tragic news.

unacceptable

[/b]unacceptable[b] This word is used almost exclusively by politicians. Hmmm.... I don't know why but "veggie" really bugs me.

One more word ...

... at least, I think this is a word. Or perhaps it's a bodily function.

It happens when people's eyes go blank and their expressionless mouths open wide as they hoot:

Wooooooooooooooooo!

honest to god, when I see a crowd doing Woooooooo! I fear for the future of the human race, as I believe it's intended to be an expression of joy.

.

Wooooooooooooooooo!

I believe Jeff Foxworthy translated that word from Redneck into English as "I've got a beer in one hand and a spit cup in the other, and can't clap."

My son, when he was a toddler, used to scream when anyone used the words "brunch" or "kilometre".

Faithbased

It never bodes anybody any good.

Especially when paired with 'initiative'.

snert

There aren't any.

My most hated phrase is 'at this point in time.'

The "N" word.

Snert thinks, and I agree :

"Even the 'N' has useful applications if used without malice."

But GWest thinks otherwise, and I disagree with him :

"please, name some non-malicious and useful applications for that word".

Since that word is so emblemmatic of the treatment US blacks received in Jim Crow days, and since it is still widely used by racists, how would one explain without using the word to someone unfamiliar with it - esp in years to come - the hurtfulness wrapped up in it? As others here have noted, context is everything.

But far more important is the idea that all words carry meanings necessary for communication, and whether or not one likes the meaning of a word has nothing to do with whether it should be kept or saved, or even avoided in "polite conversation".

The Bowldleriser of languages is usually a poseur whose objectives are no different than those of the Censor, and I've found this to be particularly true re discussions of FN issues.

You will all notice I have avoided using the word here, but that self-censorship is only because everyone here knows the word referred to, and I know it offends some.

However, if it was necessary to make a point, I would not hesitate to use it, and then let the reader make his/her judgement as to its use.

I'm still not aware, ME2

...of a single usage of the word 'nigger' in normal colloquial speech that does not involve some kind of malice, threat or negative connotation.

Apart from the odd book title, such as Conrad's 'The Nigger of the Narcissus' and 'White Niggers of America' by Pierre Vallieres - both of which use the word in a 'particular' and not un-ironic sense - I can't see much reason to use the word in any polite and un-academic or history-critical way.

But that's not the sense in which snert brought it up. Remember, what he did write was this:
Even the 'N' has useful applications if used without malice.

I'm aware of the argot of 'nigger' in hip hop culture and its appropriation by certain segments of the American 'black' community but I'd assert that, even there, the word is freighted with connotations which are seldom not all that far from malice.

In any case, I'm still waiting for snert's list of appropriate and nonmalicious, and, as he put it, useful, examples of 'nigger' in actual usage.

I don't think relegating such words - along with others such as squaw, brave, and papoose, 'Mammy', pickinini and the like to the dustbin of history (cultural and linguistic) and the pages of the OED - is a bad thing.

Which was, after all, the only point I was trying to make.

I welcome respectful comments to my posts at Tyee, especially thoughtful ones like yours just above.

G West

It should read

'Nigger is currently a derogatory term' but other than that Wiki has a pretty good description of how the word has been used and not all uses were malicious.

It is a very handy word to use synonymously for oppression and slavery which is not in and of itself racially derogatory.

Oddly enough, or maybe not, the word 'black' can be substituted and used just as maliciously as the word currently under discussion has been. When are you going to try to get it 'relegated to the dustbin of history?'

It's not the word that is the problem but how it is used. Address that issue and quit trying to rewrite the dictionary.

still no list snert

How come? Relying upon a self-edited 'resource' like wikipedia is a facile defence of a largely indefensible position.

No one is trying to re-write the dictionary - please note reference to the Oxford English Dictionary in my post. Words like 'nigger' and certain others (my list is far from exhaustive) will always retain a place in the annals of humans’ careless mistreatment of their fellow men and women: Nothing strange or revisionist about that.

Furthermore, English is the most supple and changeable of languages - something more than 360,000 words and definitions have been added (and many subtracted) from the lexicon since Dr Johnson published his dictionary. In other words, it is the most re-written and changeable of all languages - a fact which probably explains, at least in part, its current ubiquity. Unlike French, there is no ‘English’ academy riding herd on the tongue as the Académie française has done for French since 1635.

It's entirely appropriate that words like 'nigger' should fall out of use - along with the ideas and concepts with which they have been associated.

We're talking normal common usage - not literary or historical references, a point which, you'll note, was also made in my post.

Consequently, I'll continue to wait for the evidence - I haven't seen any yet.

In the meantime, I'll assume the initial clause in your first sentence is as close to capitulation as you are likely to admit.

I welcome respectful responses to my posts here at Tyee.

G West

Out with the Olde

Forsooth, me thinks thy supposition that thine word 'nigger' have place and purpose doth have little to recommend it.

Verily, let it reside in yon dictionaries as fair warning and gentle reminder to all good people that words carry weight and some be freighted with more evil than good. But gentle folk, it need not be uttered for any good purpose and watching it passeth into history presents no great harm.

I bid you sir, good day... or as we like to say here in the 21st C.

peace out

Dear Stump

You mention 'cunt' as the most hateful word. Lexicographers seem to agree that that one is most taboo. It was the last word admitted to published dictionaries from the list of banned Saxon words.

After the Norman conquest, Saxon terms for body function and for social function were considered rude, and the French equivalent substituted. 'Shit' was banned, and 'manure' not. 'Cunt' was banned while 'vagina' remained acceptable. Mostly words referring to physical things.

Gradually over the last century or so these words began finally showing up in published dictionaries, except that one.

That word 'cunt' was the very last one to be granted acknowledgement in published dictionaries, by a long way. In some way, it must have been considered by editors and lexicographers, the absolute highest authorities on words, to be the most offensive of them all.

Now that it has been included, I'm not aware of any other words which are still banned in that way.

another word

Here's a word I haven't heard since my teenage days, and which I doubt is welcomed in polite society even now.

Smegma.