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My Brother's New Kidney
'The spell is broken' says the donor, his friend.
Joel Solomon.
[Editor's note: In a previous piece, Linda Solomon described the anxiety and moral quandaries that arise in a family with genetic kidney disease. She left us with the image of her brother, Joel, preparing to receive a transplant. Today, the outcome.]
"Let's make a toast to how far medical science has come," my mother said, raising her wine glass on American Thanksgiving. I looked around the dinner table and my eyes lingered on my brother.
The week before, he'd received a new kidney from his old friend Shivon Robinsong. Around the table, his friends and family raised glasses. There was his wife, Dana, who had been so amazingly calm and upbeat as he approached the surgery and pretty much throughout.
There was the Robertson family, Amy, Gregor, Satchel, Terra, and Hannah. There was my brother's daughter, Noelle, home for the holiday from Barnard. Beside me were my two sons who had been hearing about how Joel would someday need a transplant since the moment they could talk. And next to my older son, my boyfriend, Brian. I nodded at my mother. We shared a look of understanding, and awe.
The years before, I'd watched his health deteriorate, noticing signs other people didn't seem to see. Perhaps you had to have shared the same womb to have noticed them: skin tone, posture, personality all changed in small but to me important ways.
And I had worried. For probably a decade I'd carried a special compartment of myself that was focused on worrying about what would happen when my brother got to be the age my father had been when he deteriorated, then went on dialysis, and then died.
'They don't even know'
But things were turning out remarkably different for Joel. Five days after the surgery, Joel left the hospital. It was already dark outside when Dana and I helped him get his things to the car. As we walked down Burrard, he yelled out, "I have a new kidney!"
His voice was overwhelmed by the traffic. He turned and with a mirthful smile looked around at the passersby.
"They don't even know I have a new kidney." It seems impossible. For the last week, for us, Joel's surgery had been at the centre of our world. But meanwhile, of course, life went on. He got into the car and Dana drove him home. The next day, he walked from his apartment in Gastown to St. Paul's Hospital, about a half hour.
Then he went to work. The fact is, he'd only stopped working to let the anesthesiologist insert the tubes in his mouth as he was wheeled into surgery. He was beavering away on his Blackberry practically until 20 minutes before going under.
"Five minutes," the nurse had said, and Dana and my mother and I had stood with him, holding his hand, massaging his shoulders, trying to assure him and ourselves that everything was going to be alright, that it wasn't as scary as it seemed.
Relentlessly, we flung jokes back and forth at each other, reminding Joel of funny or sweet times. Twenty minutes later, a nurse came and took Joel through a door. Dana and I sat in the waiting room for a poignant hour in which I think we both felt like we were going under the knife, too.
But we weren't. I went off to lunch and when I came back that evening, Joel was in post op, already cracking jokes. By the time they moved him back into his room, he'd begun checking his Blackberry. Business meetings began to take place by the second day.
"Visitors" talked over office issues and brought him flowers and problems. He thrived on all the company and the knowledge that he was an essential part of the world's ebb and flow.
'The spell is broken'
Shivon was in a room down the hall, a room also filled with people and flowers. The night of the transplant, I went with my kids and boyfriend to say hello to her. In a morphine-induced expansiveness, Shivon spun a tale about what had just happened.
"J.K. Rowling should write about this," she enthused. "The spell is broken." By that she was referring to the spell of a disease that had gone through generations of my family, but that had ended with my brother and me. I had faced a 25 per cent chance of inheriting the disease, but been lucky. Because I didn't have it, my kids couldn't get it either. And Joel hadn't produced offspring. He'd married into a family with four wonderful kids.
"I guess it is," I said, completely elated that the curse of polycystic kidneys had been broken for us.
The sense of being part of a miracle only grew with each day. Joel seemed as if large pieces of himself had come back, now that a healthy kidney was cleansing his blood.
Shivon decided she was going to find kidneys for all of the 300 people in the Vancouver area waiting on dialysis to find donors.
Healthy prospects
Three weeks later, I am still filled with awe at how far medical science has come. In Vancouver General Hospital, another dear friend has gotten better by the day, healthy enough to receive new lungs, should the lungs become available.
It seems like everywhere I go now, people tell me about people they know who've gotten transplants: hearts, lungs, kidneys, even livers. As one of Joel's kidney doctors said when he gave Joel a clean bill of health a few days ago, "The human body is an amazing thing."
And I would add to that: So is the human race.
Related Tyee stories:
- The Greatest Gift
My brother inherited a fatal kidney disease. What do I owe him? - 'To Live in the Hearts of Others Is Not to Die'
Your time is the best thing you can give - Charity: What Gives?
We in B.C. are among Canadians least generous to charities. So who gives? And why?
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17
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Tieleman
4 years ago
Wonderful news!
So very glad to read this and hear that Joel's transplant went well.
Joel is a great guy and important member of the community - we need him at full strength!
Continued best wishes for his complete recovery - Bill Tieleman
G West
4 years ago
I think this is a wonderful story Linda
...about one human being reaching out to another in a sincere effort to help and support.
Don't you wish that there could be more of that spirit around - not just for family and friends - but for the whole neighbourhood, community, district, province, city...oh hell, the whole country?
If we just stopped grabbing for more we might realize that, just like sharing a kidney with a good friend does wakes one to possibility, we could really change the lives of people who aren't our friends: But people with whom, nevertheless, we all share a common humanity: And it wouldn't have to happen on the operating table very often.
Not that there's anything wrong with that when it does.
jsinger
4 years ago
Fantastic
I read the original, very moving story and was afraid to comment, but now I have to. Wonderful news!, and what a great person Shivon Robinsong must be. Thanks for sharing this amazing story.
I have to ask what Joel works at, by the way. I need the kind of work that is compelling enough to keep my passion and attention 20 minutes before a kidney transplant.
G West
4 years ago
Joel Solomon
http://www.renewalpartners.com/who_we_are/founder_senior.html
SharingIsGood
4 years ago
Wonderful sentiments
come out with this story. Linda, I am so glad for you, your brother and your family; for the Robinsong/Robertsons. Shivon is an inspiration for us all.
I have watched a family friend slowly wither to next to nothing as his kidneys have failed him; and, over the years, his heart has become problematic as well. He will never get a kidney now: he's off the list. As the years tick by, we watch him less and less capable of managing. At some point. we will get a call, and we will put on our dark clothes and I will have this story to remember, and I will be thankful that people do share their kidneys even though one could not be found in time for our friend.
Sharing is good: be it a kidney, or like GWest has inferred: some time, love and compassion for all of those around us.
I can't wait for the day when I can turn to those around me and sing, "I have a new Premier who cares about the impoverished and the weak," and I hope there will be millions of voices joyfully joining the chorus. Perhaps with a new government, this wonderful tale of your brother's getting the health care and compassion he needs will become more common place. Who knows, perhaps this story will kindle others' compassion even before we get a kind-spirited government. Perhaps we need more of this sort of compassion to come out first so that we (as a province) can recognise what is needed for all.
realisticman
4 years ago
Good News
Thanks to Linda for this uplifting article, and best wishes to Shivon and Joel.
It may be a co-incidence but the British Columbia Government just announced:
B.C. INVESTS $4.3M IN LIFE-SAVING KIDNEY EQUIPMENT
VICTORIA – Patients in British Columbia with chronic kidney disease will benefit from a $4.3-million capital investment this year in medical equipment to help manage their condition, Health Minister George Abbott announced today.
“Patients with kidney disease in British Columbia have some of the best outcomes in the country and a broad range of care options,” said Abbott. “With this funding, we are increasing the capacity for treatment and ensuring that those British Columbians affected by kidney disease have access to critical health-care services within a reasonable distance of their homes.”
We can all be thankful that this type of ailment and disease is being tackled head-on by the Gordon Campbell administration. The funding also includes provisions for home-treatment.
This government's pro-active position on health-care is to be applauded.
G West
4 years ago
That reads like a government press release to me
Perhaps you'd like to address this Journal article on a related subject:
http://www.bcmj.org/optimizing-chronic-kidney-disease-care-primary-specialty-care-interface
I really wish you'd attribute your postings r/man; so much of analysis requires some knowledge of where the material comes from...In this case, as I said, your posting sounds like bumpf from the Bureau of Public Affairs or from Minister Abbott's ministerial assistant.
Professionally and from an inter-disciplinary point of view renal treatment and chronic disease management still have a ways to go.
realisticman
4 years ago
Perhaps you missed...
... this;
Quote:
Dec. 6, 2007
Ministry of Health
BC Renal Agency
G West
4 years ago
I did
So it's from Abbott's shop...pretty much what I've come to expect from that quarter.
I'll stick with the reference I cited, which concludes with:
"The status quo must go."
I have lost several good friends to renal failure in the last five years...
'nuff said'
realisticman
4 years ago
Very sorry to hear that...
...you've lost several friends to kidney disease. What your reference, the BC Medical Journal, is saying is that the patients have to become immediate involved with their disease and made aware by their physicians of the necessary care they must take. Specifically;
The shortage of physicians is also problematic. Thank god this government is at least moving in the right direction in a meaningful way.
G West
4 years ago
I don't believe that's true
This government has just spent millions of dollars and wasted well over a year on a pointless 'conversation' on health R/man.
To find out that:
a) the people of BC want the current health care program fixed, and
b) they don't want huge sections of it turned over to private enterprise and for profit health care.
Which is what the situation was before this whole dog and pony show started.
Right now I know numerous diagnostic areas in radiology where the personnel are ready right now to cover over many more services with the available technical staff and the existing facilities...and instead of acting, the hospital authorities and the region are dithering and doing nothing.
That money could and would have been better spent. Not to mention the services in the pharmacare and medical services bureaucracy which have been farmed out to foreign corporations and which are now;
1) sending profits out of the province instead of keeping all the funds inside the province, and
2) doing an abysmal job of providing service for BC citizens into the bargain - (try phoning medical services with a question or with a problem sometime).
This is the worst government British Columbia has ever had...within living memory and the mess is going to take years to fix...unfortunately too damn late for anyone except Gordon and Michael Campbell and their friends.
There aren't enough Shivon Robinsongs to get this turkey airborn again....
realisticman
4 years ago
Michael now too
West; I do not wish to continue a discourse on this thread with yet another long diatribe from you on what an ogre you think that our present premier is. I know, and many others do too, what your opinion is of the present administration in British Columbia. Other threads will give us plenty of opportunity to rant, I'm sure. This sister/brother story above is an encouraging story of hope and a new lease on life for one, magnanimously given by another. I read it and it it seemed appropriate to mention the government initiative that was announced just three days ago - as this story was going to press.
May we and our loved ones live long lives in good health and Mazel Tov to Joel and Shivon.
G West
4 years ago
And I posted above here
A very positive appreciation of the story and the people involved too - Did you miss it?
And, I didn't drag the government into it at all.
You DID.
realisticman
4 years ago
Wrong again, West
Look at the post above my first!
Sharing is Good
I posted, then you jumped in. Please!
G West
4 years ago
Sorry bud, you're mistaken
Here's my first post on this thread: number 2 in the list...1 day ago:
...about one human being reaching out to another in a sincere effort to help and support.
Don't you wish that there could be more of that spirit around - not just for family and friends - but for the whole neighbourhood, community, district, province, city...oh hell, the whole country?
If we just stopped grabbing for more we might realize that, just like sharing a kidney with a good friend does wakes one to possibility, we could really change the lives of people who aren't our friends: But people with whom, nevertheless, we all share a common humanity: And it wouldn't have to happen on the operating table very often.
Not that there's anything wrong with that when it does.
Not a single word about the govenment...now look at your first offering:
It may be a co-incidence but the British Columbia Government just announced:
I'll await your apology. Please!
realisticman
4 years ago
No apology needed
As I said GWest. I am not going to go into yet another to and fro match with you on the merits, or not, of the present BC administration.
Here, for the last time, is the chronology. Please read carefully.
Quote:
I can't wait for the day when I can turn to those around me and sing, "I have a new Premier who cares about the impoverished and the weak,"
I replied to this post with my comment adding the concurrent information from the BC Renal Agency, partly because SharingIsGood took an uncalledfor swipe at the government in the middle of a personal family & friends story.
Immediately following this post you jumped in, as I pointed out, with the post titled,
That reads like a government press release to me
SharingIsGood introduced the government to this thread. I responded. You requested the source, which I had already given, so I gave it again. Then you run off with rhetorical comments such as this;
As I said before; not here, and not now.
Au revoir.
G West
4 years ago
That's not the chronology
Every comment thread begins at the beginning - immediately following the journalism; my comment was no 2 (after Bill Tieleman's) and your comment followed more than a day later.
The comments form a linear narrative and yours, not mine, mentioned the government in an approving fashion whereas mine was respectful and complimentary of the personal issues involved and did not enter any thoughts about this government at all. I only entered the debate about the government when I felt compelled to do in response to your pandering to Campbell and his compromised friends and fellow travellers.
For someone to pretend to being above the fray and immune to controversy is really quite laughable.
The record is clear and your attempt to suggest anything else is silly.
How could I jump in to a narrative where I had already posted an opinion, which was completely neutral to the role of the government in health care in this province?
I was responding to YOU - not to the story.
I await your apology – but, on form, I don’t expect it.